Future mother and founder of Modetrotter by Marie

I met Marie when she was six months pregnant with her daughter Java. We met at the Modetrotter store on Rue d’Aboukir, and we had a long conversation about her relationship with pregnancy, her upcoming motherhood, and what had changed for her since then. I appreciated the honesty with which Marie described her daily life, how she felt while pregnant, her challenges and joys, always with a lot of humor and self-deprecation. Thank you, Marie, for this inspiring exchange, and congratulations again on the birth of your beautiful little Java!

Photography by Emma Bedos for talm

"Overall, it took me a long time to announce it to those around me (except at the office). In the end, I took a while to accept being pregnant."

To all the mamas: How did you announce your pregnancy?

Marie: "I told my team pretty early because, honestly, I was being super annoying! Normally, I have quite a steady, easy-going personality, I don’t usually have mood swings… but this time it was the complete opposite! So one day, I sent a text to the whole team and said, ‘Well, I’m telling you this because I realize I’m not being myself, and I probably shouldn’t be telling you this now... but I’m pregnant.’

On the other hand, I waited until the last minute to tell my shareholders, and honestly, they were really happy for me, but I wasn’t comfortable. I told them by text – the same with my parents, announcing it was really stressful – in a way, I didn’t like officially announcing the shift from being a daughter to a woman, it made me very uncomfortable! It bothered me, it embarrassed me – those were probably the only things that stressed me out: the announcements.

Overall, it took me a long time to announce it to those around me (except at the office). In the end, I took a while to accept being pregnant, and as long as I hadn’t fully processed it, I felt like people were happier for me than I was for myself."

Photography by Emma Bedos for talm

To all the mamas: How has your pregnancy been overall? How do you feel?

Marie: "Honestly, I find pregnancy really annoying! Like this morning, for example, I had to do all the tests for diabetes, for two hours... blood tests, urine tests, that disgusting drink they make you consume... it’s all just annoying! I realized when talking to others that a lot of women also hated being pregnant.

It’s cute when the baby moves, it’s cute when I’m lying in bed and I feel her moving, but when she wakes me up at night, and I’m peacefully sleeping and suddenly feel kicks all over, honestly, I only find it cute for about two seconds... (laughs). Same with the ultrasound, you see her little face, it’s cute, but when I sent the photo to my mom, she said, ‘Didn’t that move you? I’m so emotional, it makes me want to cry.’ Not at all for me, it still feels too abstract, it’s just a face that looks like every other baby’s face. If she had something special, I don’t know, if I’d recognized Edouard’s or my nose, I might have had a little moment. And in the end, it’s the girlfriends who get more emotional for you, not me really...

My friend Caro told me something interesting, ‘You’ll see, there’s this sort of solidarity between moms, it’s really surprising, there’s always a lot of compassion for those who are pregnant.’ And honestly, I get it, because I already have a lot of friends who are pregnant, and I didn’t realize how tiring and difficult it is, so for sure, if a friend gets pregnant tomorrow, I’ll take much better care of her than I have up until now."

"Getting pregnant was a total surprise!"

To all the mamas: Being pregnant, you have to deal with many restrictions, many things you can't do. Not to mention changing tastes, cravings, and even nausea... how has that been for you?

Marie: "I was really sick in the beginning of my pregnancy: I vomited three times a day, every morning, at lunch, and in the evening. I was sick until almost five months, and even now if I haven’t eaten enough, I get what’s called an empty stomach syndrome: I throw up immediately... and when I’m too hungry, that makes me throw up too!

I thought I wasn’t immune to toxoplasmosis at the beginning of my pregnancy – I don’t like meat, so with the raw veggies, the vegetables that made up almost 100% of my diet... I was disgusted! In the end, I only had two months of restrictions, I did the blood test again quickly and saw that I was immune to toxo. I’m naturally a bit obsessive about food, I tend to eat the same thing all the time, and during pregnancy, it’s even worse: I love fruits and vegetables, but when they explained to me that the baby’s nervous system is built with proteins, and since I don’t like meat that much, I tried to make little efforts, I try to pay attention, but that’s the only thing that weighs on me.

As for the rest, I didn’t drink, I didn’t smoke before being pregnant, I can understand how frustrating that can be, but for me, it didn’t change much. I just try to pay a little more attention to the variety of my diet for the baby.

Photography by Emma Bedos for talm

To all the mamas: Did you have any cravings?

Marie: "No new cravings, but I used to drink a can of Diet Coke every day before pregnancy, and I loved eating very sweet things (normally, I have an afternoon snack every day!). But the moment I got pregnant, I never drank Coke again—not because it disgusts me, but I just don’t crave it at all anymore—and the same goes for sugar, I don’t crave it at all! However, I really wanted vegetables and fruits; my body only asked for healthy things. I didn’t eat healthier than usual, though, because I’ve always eaten a lot of vegetables and salads, it’s just that I ate less sugar overall."

To all the mamas: One of the really unpleasant symptoms that pregnant women face in early pregnancy is fatigue... was that too hard for you?

Marie: "Right now, I’m feeling good because I went to bed at 9 p.m. last night, so honestly, I’m fine! The first three months, I was more tired than I’ve ever been in my life—unbelievable! A kind of fatigue I’ve never experienced! I’d get home at night, go to bed, and sleep 12 or 13 hours every night for 3 months, but really… it was a bit depressing!

Yes, I found it depressing, actually. First, you’re sick, so you don’t feel well, and on top of that, you’re extremely tired—there were moments at the office when I just wanted to curl up and fall asleep in front of my screen. I wanted to say, ‘I’m done, I can’t take it anymore!’ Exhausting! So, honestly, the beginning wasn’t great..."

Photography by Marie Courroy

To all the mamas: How did you and Edouard decide to have a baby? How did you react when you realized you were pregnant?

Marie: "Getting pregnant was really a surprise, like a huge surprise.

With Edouard, we were kind of the same from the start: we’d never said, ‘Oh, great, we’re going to have fifty kids, it’s going to be amazing and everything,’ not at all! Since it happened a bit unexpectedly, we didn’t really question whether we should keep it or not, it was obvious. However, we hadn’t even been together for a week when it happened!!

Strangely, we never questioned it, even though we questioned a million other things: he doesn’t live here, he lives in Biarritz, so it was a bit sudden… I had just bought a house thinking I was going to move to the countryside. But when I bought it, I thought I’d still spend a few nights a week in Paris, but then... change of plans!

I’m really happy, but it brought a lot of new things and a lot of organizing, and organization is not my thing at all.

In fact, that’s what was a bit hard: the surprise + all the annoying things. You kind of feel like the surprise quickly turns into something a bit crappy! Meaning, pretty quickly I thought, ‘Whoa, I was so happy before, and now it feels like I have nothing but crappy things…’ And what’s crazy is that since everyone is so happy for you, everyone’s really excited for you, you feel like you have to say, ‘I’m happy,’ when you haven’t really made peace with the idea yourself, you know?

That’s what was a bit complicated for me; it was so many changes all at once. In just six months, I found myself with a guy, a kid, no apartment in Paris, and a house in the countryside. I wasn’t really ready for all of that. I was about 50% ready for the countryside, but not 100%, so I had to digest it a bit. Now I’m fine, I’m really happy, but it brought a lot of new things and a lot of organization, and that’s just not my thing! I had to organize it in my mind! My guy was really happy when I told him I was pregnant, but he said, ‘If it hadn’t happened this way, I honestly don’t know if we would’ve ever said, ‘Oh, maybe,’ or if we would’ve said it too late!’ So we took what came to us, thinking it was great just like that!"

Photography by Marie Courroy

To all the mamas: Did you have any particular anxieties?

Marie: "I wasn’t worried at all – but I’m not naturally a stressed person – I’m very fatalistic, I trust life, I thought, ‘If this baby is here now, it’s because it’s the right time and it’s meant to be this way.’ I wasn’t worried.

However, I have a friend who was pregnant at the same time as me, and she lost her baby. She didn’t even realize it until one day at her gynecologist’s appointment when they told her the heart had stopped beating – and for me, who wasn’t worried at all – and since you don’t feel anything for a while – I couldn’t really get attached to my baby because I kept thinking, ‘Maybe her heart isn’t beating anymore,’ and I thought about it all the time, every day. I’d see my gynecologist every month, and every month she’d say, ‘No, everything’s fine,’ and for three days I’d think, ‘No, it’s fine, everything’s okay,’ and then for three weeks, I’d think, ‘Maybe everything’s going wrong,’ and this went on until I felt her move. Now, I feel her so much!

That was a bit strange. People celebrate for you, but I wanted to tell them, ‘Yes, but maybe her heart isn’t beating anymore, don’t be too happy,’ and you can’t really say that. If it hadn’t happened to my friend, it wouldn’t have been something that would’ve crossed my mind spontaneously..."

To all the mamas: Do you have many pregnant friends around you?

Marie: "I’ve had two big waves of pregnant friends: I have lots of friends who now have kids aged between 5 and 10, roughly, and now I’m in a second wave – I have three friends who are pregnant at the same time as me, so that’s nice. And I have many who just gave birth. Sometimes it’s their second, so I don’t feel too out of sync. I’m definitely not ahead, but I don’t feel alone either. And I found my friends to be really good advice-givers! One of them just had to say, ‘I have a friend, her belly cracked the day before giving birth, she has stretch marks here and there,’ and that was enough to convince me to slather on cream and oil... they also gave me some sordid details about what’s going to happen to me, and I’m really glad I know about it!"

Photography by Marie Courroy

To all the mamas: You’re the founder of Modetrotter – how do you balance pregnancy and your career? How do you approach your life as a business owner with a baby?

Marie: "I’m really well supported by the girls who work with me. Before, Modetrotter was a multi-brand, and for the brand itself, it's been 3 years, but overall, it’s been 10 years. I’m lucky that it's my brand: if one morning I want to come in at 10 a.m. instead of 9 a.m. because my daughter threw up on me, it’s not a big deal. I tell myself that others have done it before me, but I might change my mind once I’m in the moment. In any case, in my mind, the child has to adapt to your life.

"It’s out of the question for work to take priority over personal life."

I’m not too worried about balancing career and motherhood. And you know, I’ve never worked like crazy either: I’ve never worked on weekends, except if there's a collection launch or something specific to do, of course, but once the day is over, once the week is over, that’s it. When I come through here at 9 p.m., the lights are still on, and I say to Laura, for example, ‘What are you doing?’ It's out of the question for work to take priority over personal life at some point – and if even I can leave at normal hours, there’s no reason to stay... unless you have a dinner you want to attend before your thing, but it shouldn’t become a habit. I don’t want the girls working on weekends. The advantage of a small company is that we can be flexible."

Photography by Marie Courroy

To all the mamas: Have you changed anything in your workout routine or your lifestyle in general?

Marie: "I haven’t changed anything in my life. Well, actually, the first 3 months, I was really tired, I slept a lot. But since it got better (because, honestly, I continued to be sick after that, but the fatigue, from the end of the 3rd month, was gone, and I felt it like a switch, it was crazy!), I started walking again. I love walking, I walked a lot, and I continue to walk like crazy. I used to do a little bit of Ashtanga yoga once a week, but not much right now. I signed up for prenatal Pilates classes – honestly, I’m bored, I find it super slow – but the bigger I get, the harder it will be to bend down, and the more I think it will be good for me!

What has really killed me in my daily life since the beginning: the stairs! I felt like I weighed 100 kilos. I can walk for miles, but the stairs in the subway, I find them tough.
Being pregnant doesn’t stop me from traveling: in May, I went to Sicily, the south of France, Morocco, and then I’m going to Biarritz, and I’ll go back to Morocco for work, living my little life! I was told I should wear compression stockings, but with the heatwave, I’m going to die! I do it on the plane though. Luckily, I haven’t had too many vein issues so far.

I have two obsessions: the pregnancy mask and stretch marks.

To all the mamas: Do you have any advice for dressing while pregnant?

Marie: "I’m not really into maternity stuff, I might change my mind in 3 months, but I refuse to buy maternity clothes, I don’t want to buy jeans with a big elastic waistband for example! I don’t want to buy clothes I’ll never wear again.

Right now it’s cool because it’s summer, so I’m often in dresses. Even if I can’t button my pants, if I have a big t-shirt, it works perfectly. I don’t want to switch to t-shirts that go down to my knees and leggings and flats – I dress exactly like before, with the clothes I still fit into, of course.

On the other hand, it’s all the body changes that I don’t really like – it kind of grosses me out. I have friends who say, ‘Oh, I think the pregnant woman’s body is so beautiful,’ but not really for me – and people who come and put their hand on your belly, it really annoys me. People who know me know that it’s not going to happen, so thank god it doesn’t happen very often, but I really hate that…

Anyway, I don’t spend four hours looking at myself in the mirror. I think it’s going to be even worse after. And after giving birth, you have a flabby belly and all, right? Anyway, yeah, I have a bit of a hard time with all of that..."

Photography by Marie Courroy

To all the mamas: What are your beauty routines during pregnancy?

Marie: "I have two obsessions: the pregnancy mask and stretch marks.

The pregnancy mask, that’s not going to happen to me! I have SPF 50 in my bag and I put it on ten times a day, even between the time I leave my house and get to the subway – right now I’m using Caudalie, but I’m not necessarily loyal to one brand, I just started using this one, so I’ll finish it, and honestly, I’m really happy with it, I think it’s great. I’m obsessed with sunscreen, there’s no way around it! Edouard said to me last time, 'Honestly, if you get the pregnancy mask, that would really be unfair,' because I’m seriously doing everything I need to do! For example, if we’re talking and we’re in the shade, and then suddenly someone calls me, and I walk to the opposite sidewalk to talk, I completely cover my face as I walk – people must think, 'She’s crazy!' – but honestly, I don’t care, I’d rather be thought of as crazy than get it. And while I’m in Morocco, I know I’ll have a cap, sunglasses, and SPF 50.

My second obsession is stretch marks, I’m slathering cream on like crazy! At first, I used a cream in the morning and an oil at night, but now I only use oil. Anything you can avoid, you should do it – I’m starting to see the line on my belly and it disgusts me, but I can’t do anything about it, it’s hormonal, and I think it goes away, right?

As for makeup, I don’t wear much, I haven’t changed anything – I’m lucky that it’s summer – even with SPF 50, I managed to get a little color. Otherwise, everyone tells you that during pregnancy, you get great skin, beautiful hair, but honestly, I haven’t noticed any difference – I’m lucky, my face hasn’t gotten too chubby – well, I think not too much! – even though I was convinced I’d gain 20 kilos and my face would get puffy – because when I was a teenager, as soon as I gained 2 kilos, it showed right away. If that had happened, I would’ve at least tried to put on some Terracotta to cover it up a bit!

I still go to the hairdresser, get highlights, though he told me that it’s the hair dyes you should avoid, and highlights are fine because they don’t touch the scalp, so I continue with those.

Also, I use organic nail polish. Someone gave me organic nail polish remover, but I think it doesn’t work, so I went out and bought a remover that smells horrible, I do it really quickly and try not to breathe it in, but I still keep painting my nails! Again, I don’t do it every week, but I know I’ll probably paint my toenails this summer… I try not to breathe in the smells, that kind of thing."

Photography by Marie Courroy

Apart from the oil I used for my belly (Eucerin oil – I picked it because a friend told me to), I didn’t know anything about it at all – I saw the little pregnant logo, which is reassuring, but the packaging isn’t great... just like all the skincare products people told me to use: I started with Mustela cream. And in my new house with my beautiful bathroom and visible storage, I would love a product that looks nice. Most maternity clothes are ugly, and the skincare too, it’s not all great... If at least we could have some cute, pretty products in our bathroom, that would be amazing!

Interview conducted by Kenza Keller